Actually the above post title isn’t factually correct. Maybe I CAN ski, I’ve just never tried it…perhaps really I am a budding * cough * Eddie the Eagle and I just haven’t discovered the depths of my hidden talents. Maybe, just maybe, I should be in training for the winter Olympics!
Okay, I am getting a teeny tiny bit ahead of myself but I was recently contacted by Crystal Holidays to see if I wanted to be in with a chance of becoming one of their ambassadors and become a Crystal #SkiExplorer.
My first thought was BRR. Sno-way.
My second thought was OOH. Glühwein.
My third thought was HELL to the YEAH!
As I said, I’ve never been skiing, or on holiday to any snowy destination as a matter of fact. I’m more of a fair-weather kind of holidaymaker…you know, sun, sea and sangria. Mr M on the otherhand has been skiing a few times and we’ve often talked about talking the family on a skiing jaunt but we’ve never quite made it…yet. I’ll be honest, lying face down in the snow for five days has never really quite appealed to me (and lets face it, as a complete novice, that’s EXACTLY where I would be) but the idea of being somewhere snowy, with a roaring fire, and a hot chocolate – now that side appeals!
Crystal Holidays have come up with some very individual Ski characters – Après Animal, Mile Muncher, Gadget Guru, The Unstoppables and Piste Princess. If I had to pick a category that I slot into then I think The Unstoppables would be the most relevant.
For me, life. NEVER. STOPS.
And that includes on our holidays.
You want to know what my average day on a typical holiday would look like? It would go a little something like this…
- Mr M will have got the children ready whilst I have a nice long lie in
- I’ll then get out of bed to a lavish breakfast all laid out
- Before retreating to pool/spa/hot tub where I will relax for the rest of the day with a book in hand and wine on tap…
That’s the dream scenario, not the real life scenario.
In reality what happens is I get the clothes organised for everyone, sort out the days itinerary, organise breakfast, find the suncream, apply the suncream, clean up the suncream that has dripped all over the floor. Find the camera, recharge the camera, making sure we have cash. Find hats, matching pairs of gloves, shoes that aren’t wet or don’t blister after approximately 3 minutes of wearing. Pack the bag to take out, make sure everyone has had a wee.
Have you got the key? Who has got the key?
Usher everyone out of the door and onwards to the days destination. Run back to the room because have forgotten camera/money/favourite cuddly toy/shoes are hurting.
Arrive at room to discover nobody did in fact have the door key. By which time it’s about 12pm and everyone is asking whats for lunch.
Ah we’re not that bad.
But family life does feel a little like that sometimes, even when on holiday, and I won’t lie – the thought of that lovely glass of wine in peace at elevenses, lunchtime, afternoon tea and dinner time the end of the day is what keeps me going.
We don’t really do much to help ourselves either – I’m not entirely sure we know how to relax. Our last holidays have been to Florida (not sure that actually counts as a relaxing vacation – if you’ve ever been you’ll know what I mean) and also sightseeing in 40 degree heat in Northern Italy for 10 days. I like to use a fitness app and one day we walked 21km in that heat. Twenty-one-whole-kilometres. That’s 13 miles in 40-degree heat. No wonder we didn’t wee all day (was a handy timesaver though, definitely cut down all those annoying toilet trips!).
So you see, a skiing holiday really is up our street. Even if I can’t ski. And I’m not keen on the cold. And I have a morbid fear of chair lifts. I’ve told you about that before right? YES. A Disney waterpark designed as a melting ski resort is actually the closest I’ve got to skiing, complete with unfortunate leg injury on the Chair Lift of Doom. I said I didn’t want to go on it, but does anyone listen to me? Of course not.
So yes, a skiing holding, sounds amazing…then again, on second thoughts…
Who will of course look like this is she gets picked to be a #SkiExplorer